Friday, June 30, 2006

Ngozi Graduates..


My niece, Ngozi (pronounced En-go-zee), graduated from middle school this month. I was unable to attend the ceremony since she and my sister live in NY, but I shared in the festivities thru photos. This is a photo of my niece on her way to her junior prom. Isn't she lovely (singing like Stevie Wonder..lol). I think I'm going to need to start following her with a broomstick in hand for all those boys that might want to approach her. She'll be 14 in September. Lord help us.

I'm very proud of her and look forward to her high school years. She will be moving to London this summer where my sister will be pursuing her masters in Photography & Urban Culture. I'm honored to call them family for all that they have and will continue to accomplish. They give me inspiration.

Testimony...


I purchased the new India Arie album this week and I have mixed feelings about it. India, by far, is one of my favorite artists. One of the reasons is because I love the messages/lyrics. So much of music these days is so shallow and lacks depth of any kind. The other reason is because I'm partial to the acoustic sound, especially acoustic guitar. With this album, the messages were there, no doubt and I loved them, but the actual music was kind of lacking. The one song that is my favorite is called 'Good Mourning'. The message was right on point for where I am emotionally right now and it had the acoustic sound that I like. The rest of the music was a little too 'Disney' for me. And when I say Disney, I mean animated. This is just my opinion and I'm still in love with her and her style. I will be looking forward to the next installment anxiously nonetheless.


On the other hand, I'm loving the freedom India seems to be experiencing with her hair these days. The above photo is from her current album. And I noticed that her hair is again shaved when she made an appearance on the BET Awards this week. I love how she doesn't feel the need to keep the short fro she was rockin' for a while in preperation for this album release and went and cut it all off again. She looks so cute to me. And on a totally womanly note, I'm so jealous of her clothes. I absolutely love them. I wish I were small enough to rock them or could find that style of wrap clothing for myself. It's totally the look I'd love to rock, but I'm not quite there! (smile).


Regardless, I applaude India for continuing to do her thing because she does it with style and class. And even though this latest installment of her album isn't my favorite, I have to say that she's still a favorite artist of mine for her outspokeness and her stunning inner beauty!


Tuesday, June 20, 2006

Where do I begin?

I find that I derive so many inspirations from so many sources, yet it's difficult for me to inspire myself to do the things that I need to accomplish in order to achieve 'true happiness'. I wait and wait for things to happen that will improve my life and my state of being on a personal level and yet I'm very much a go-getter in other areas of my life where I know sitting around and waiting will yield nothing. How does one change this pattern? Like the photo above, I would love to be a celestial light in my own right, but I have not found the path that has lead me there. Where do I begin?

Along with my locs journey, I am also on a weight-loss journey. All in the hopes that these will lead to a path of self discovery that I've not experienced in my life. My confidence and self esteem have been weakened by recent experiences in my personal life and I hope to learn the things about myself that I have yet to figure out and heal. Will a severe loss in weight help me conquer my fears and improve my self esteem. Must I delve deeper inside myself and go beyond my outer appearance to truly find the answers I seek? Where do I begin?

Will I ever find love that will endure with a man that is as worthy of me as I am of him? Where does the journey to find him begin? Is it destiny or timing that brings true love into your life or since we are blessed with the freedom of free will, is it opportunity and searching that leads you to your mate? And if so, where do I begin?

I don't have the answers to these questions yet, but I hope that at the end of this long journey I have embarked on, I will. Only time will tell.....

Monday, June 19, 2006

Reflections....


Alright.... I have to say that I was inspired by Jameka (a myspace friend and fellow eblogger member) to write from the heart here by her example. After reading her journal/blog I realized I wasn't alone in a lot of my views and feelings and found validation in that where I hadn't felt it previously.

I have always kept a personal journal, but was never inclined to share my innermost feelings on a forum like this. I find that I need to do this in order to cleanse myself and put it all out there. I don't know if anyone will read this, but the possibility that they will is enough to make me feel liberated in writing it. I feel this can be cathartic for me, so I'm going to give it a try and look forward to any support I can gain from making this step.

More to come soon....

Nat

Wednesday, June 07, 2006

The Journey continues... June 2006

I know I haven't updated this in quite some time; been pretty busy. I recently had a birthday on May 26th (GEMINI'S RULE). I view my birthday as my personal New Year, so I tend to be very reflective. And since I turned 33, the age of Christ's death, I wondered about purpose and my place here. I can't say I found the answers, so that is the current journey I'm embarking on. I analyzed my life and made personal goals for the coming year.

As a gift to myself, I went to Miami for Memorial Day weekend with my sister. I had a great time and realize that I need to take more weekend trips as a respite from the every day routines that seem to weigh one down so heavily.

I've added some recent photos that were taken of me in my 5th month of locking. My locs are coming along well and I'm surprised that they're locking so quickly. I'm proud of my babies and the progress they've made. I still battle with patience, as my thoughts are often that I just want to fast forward to a year from now and beyond.. LMAO! Guess I can't really do that, huh. SHUCKS (kicking my foot in the dirt)!

Insprirations and Blessings,
Natacha